Can I interest you in a business venture?

Apparently this weekend I was very ambitious and decided to start my own business. I received a phone call this morning from my bank wanting to verify some purchases this weekend. The lady on the phone was very nice and had a few transactions she wanted to cover.

Since I had gone up to LA last weekend I thought maybe they were going to ask me about any Disney or pirate related purchases.

First purchase: “Did you try to make a purchase at 3am this morning for $1.00 via yahoo?“
“ No, I did not do that”.


Second Purchase: “Did you spend $534.00 on business materials in Portugal yesterday?”

“Um, no I definitely did not do that.”

“Are you sure you weren’t in Portugal this weekend?”, asked the nice but obviously geographically challenged bank teller.

“No, I am positive I was not in Portugal this weekend, nor did I authorize any purchase of that amount to anyone in the US or Portugal this weekend”.

“Ok, great”, the banker said.

Third Purchase: “Did you spend $656.00 on marketing materials in Portugal this weekend?”

“No, like I said I was never in Portugal this weekend or even used this card this weekend”.

“Are you sure you didn’t go to Portugal this weekend?”, the banker asked.

In my mind I was thinking, “Ok, wait, now that you mention it you’re totally right, I did go to Portugal this weekend. It’s a 16 hour flight from San Diego, but you’re right, I did go to Portugal this weekend and it completely slipped my mind. “

But instead I said,”I am positive I did not jaunt off to Portugal this weekend”.

“Well if you didn’t authorize these purchases then it seems like maybe your card was compromised and we’ll cancel it.”, the banker said.

“Great, let’s do that. Cancel the card, because I did not make those purchases”, I said as firmly as I could.

“I can do that,” the banker said,”But to verify, you didn’t go to Portugal for the weekend?”

Are you being serious? I know that this is credit card fraud and I’m glad they’re being vigilant, but, really? I can promise you I did not go to Portugal and back this weekend. Check my atm card; you’ll see that I used it all around San Diego all weekend. And while San Diego has a large Portuguese community, we have never been mistaken for Portugal. Having been to Portugal myself I promise I would absolutely know if I went back to visit.

But again, all I said was,”Yes, I am sure that I did not go to Portugal for the weekend.”

"Well, if you are sure you did not go to Portugal then I guess we can cancel the card. If you're totally sure", the banker said.

"I am sure that I did not go to Portugal this weekend!", I said with more than a little exasperation.

From there, the phone call was more standard. But since it appears that I have invested in business materials, and that I went all the way to Portugal for them, can I interest you in a business opportunity?